I'm just going to dive right in, I already know that some of them aren't going to go down well.
Let's start with unnecessary remakes... Disney, I'm looking at you. This year has seen Aladdin, Dumbo and Lion King, and while I didn't hate them there was little to no reason that any of them needed to be reimagined apart from money. Are you so stuck for ideas that you aren't able to make new properties?
*snap* Bye, bye.
The "regional accent" variation. The main culprit of this was Wonder Park, the trailer was released with an amazing voice cast but when it was released in the UK some of the cast was different. This made zero sense to me, especially when the voices in the trailer were so recognisable. The other puzzling this was why it wasn't the whole cast that was changed out.
*snap*
With cinema screens being all wide and giant I'm calling for an end to the smaller aspect ratios. Particularly memorable were Mid90s in a camcorder style 4:3 and The Lighthouse (technically a 2020 film) in 1:1.19. When the screen they're being shown on doesn't blend in with the rest of the wall then the whole viewing experience becomes a distraction.
*snap*
I have some marketing related points, one for being bad and one for being too good, because evidently I'm never happy. The MA spoiler poster needed to go. I understand that it was an impressive image and got across a message about who Ma was but it was such a key point to give away. Part two of this is the trailer for Anna, it has part of the restaurant fight scene in it and the music goes incredibly well with the action and it had a real impact on my anticipation for the film. When that moment finally arrived the music they picked for the feature was so bad, no striking beats with punches, no adrenaline in the scene. This also happened in Kingsman: Golden Circle with Eggsy's stunts with the cab, but their music change almost worked.
*snap*
There were a lot of music related things this year, I got a little fatigue at some point but this next choice was entirely based on quality. Diana Ross: Her Life, Love and Legacy. I love Diana Ross, so a documentary about her was an exciting prospect. What I was left with was honestly a bit of an insult. It felt more like a family video than anything else, with terrible setups, badly executed scripted pieces and repetitive use of clips... this did not add to the legacy.
*snap*
I had a change of heart about Robert Pattinson's acting ability this year, though technically because that happened in The Lighthouse I can't talk about it until 2020, the thing I will not change my opinion about are RPat's accents. In the non-2019 film and The King we have some amazing examples of why they might not be his strong suit... perhaps it's time he gave them up.
*snap*
While we're talking about voices, Nick Kroll as Fester... as I mentioned in my review, I can understand why you would pick that sort of voice but it was either exactly the same or very similar to Coach Steve in Big Mouth and it felt like too much of a distraction and lazy.
*snap*
Whole films, I'm coming for you next!
Where to start? Men In Black: International. There were few redeeming features about this one. For me it's akin to "Die Hard 5: Died so hard no one ever wanted to talk about it again". Despite Kumail Nanjiani's fun performance I will be forever remembering MIB as a trilogy.
*snap*
The Queen's Corgi trailer looked amusing but its final effort was offensive and crude, and this is coming from someone who isn't easily offended. Off with its head!
*snap*
Now, the one that won't be popular... Endgame. Yep, the whole thing. Thanos needs to snap that bitch harder than a sassy comeback. After Infinity War I was reeling and so ready for Endgame but when I walked out of that midnight screening I was disappointed. While there was one moment that made me emotional, the changes and the culmination of events were not a fitting resolution for me. I still haven't brought the blu-ray and somehow this isn't bothering the completist in me.
[Note: I have just rewatched this in a double bill and I didn't hate it as much, but I'm still happy to get rid of it.]
*snap*
I have another Marvel movie to throw into the mix, but for this it's just the end credits. The end credits from Spider-Man: Far From Home. I'm not really a Spidey fan but Homecoming was good and I was looking forward to seeing FFH and how it coped with the aftermath of Endgame. Well, I really enjoyed the film... and then I saw the end credit scenes. The consequences of those made me so angry that I was clenching my jaw as I left.
*snap*
The last thing on my list is a little moot because he will be gone soon enough, but... Unlimited Phil, you gotta go. Cineworld's attempt at recreating Groundhog Day was fun but so badly executed that by the time anyone properly worked out what was going on with the ads we all hated him and his smug face. Maybe we should be sticking to the film compilation ads and Angry Birds?
*snap*
What things would you like to forget from this year in film? Drop me a comment below or hop over to Twitter and let me know.
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