The Witches ★★★☆☆ | Movie Review

Synopsis


A young boy and his grandmother have a run-in with a coven of witches and their leader.

Directed by Robert Zemeckis.
Written by Robert Zemeckis, Kenya Barris and Guillermo del Toro.
Starring Anne Hathaway, Octavia Spencer and Stanley Tucci.
Released available to stream on Now TV.


Review


Well, here we are... I'm not really sure I remember the original, but I suspect that's a bit of a blessing.

When a young boy encounters a strange and frightening woman his grandmother tells him about the existence of witches. In an attempt to hide from the woman, they take a trip that accidentally drops them in the middle of a witch convention led by the Grand High Witch.

At 1 hour 46 the witches feels like a short film to watch, but on reflection that runtime seems incredibly long for what was actually presented. The opening feels long, while somehow empty. There's obviously a need to get the backstory out, but I'm not sure I enjoyed the Chris Rock voiceover combined with the condensed story from Grandma.

I don't think there's a whole lot to grumble about with the storyline, witches exist, they hate children, plan to obliterate them all... blah blah blah. While I'm not entirely convinced there's a place for some of Roald Dahl's stories these days, but this sort of kids in peril and magic plots are fairly easy ones to get along with.

I love seeing Octavia Spencer in things, though I refuse to accept her as a grandmother. There were some moments with her that I really enjoyed, but there were quite a few scenes where the reactions didn't feel right for the situation. This wasn't something isolated to Spencer's performance, a combination of odd script and strangely edited transitions and effects left me with a lot of moments to pause.

Jahzir Bruno as Hero Boy was very good once the setting moved to the hotel, and I loved his reactions to hearing his gran explaining how to identify a witch.

Let's talk about the Grand High Witch shall we? Anne Hathaway definitely felt like the only one who was all in on their performance... and that's maybe the only positive thing I have to say about it. It was so incredibly difficult to understand what was being said half of the time, you can take an educated guess, but that doesn't really help when you're watching a film.

While all the witches have effects on them it's mainly Hathaway that had the screen time with it. As a scary creation it's pretty good, the mouth and teeth give a very sinister vibe... but at times I felt like it was overused. There were times when the effects really shone. The Grand High Witch's features looked spookily realistic, and here movements flowed seamlessly. But then you got the throwing of objects, and the animals, and it falls apart. The cat in particular reminded me of early, dubious, Harry Potter effects. (And that's not the only Harry Potter element I felt, there are strong Dudley vibes too.)

This reimagining of The Witches may have enough rodent action and face-pulling for the kids to get some enjoyment out of it, but this empty feeling film left me with little to remember apart from the negatives.

What you should do


If you have Now TV and some kids to entertain then it's worth a try, but I wouldn't be telling anyone they needed to pay money to see this one.

Movie thing you wish you could take home


The ability to look youthful without the scary side effects.

Comments